Milking The Joke

In a homogenized development, HP Hood has inked Red Sox center fielder Coco Crisp as the spokesperson for New England's leading dairy company. And why not? The marketing practically writes itself: Because if you’re looking for a balanced breakfast, what goes better with milk than Coco Crisp? ...

At 5-foot-7, 165 pounds, meddlesome Cardinals shortstop David Eckstein is perennially among the hardest men to fan in the National League –- without a nickname to show for it (“The Eck,” of course, has long since been taken by Hall of Fame pitcher Dennis Eckersley). If Eckstein were an insect, he’d be a mosquito. And if Eckstein were an adjective, he’d be annoying. So forget about the 5-foot-9, 168-pound Red Sox legend. David Eckstein is the real Johnny Pesky. And the bat he totes is the real “Pesky Pole.” …

He might sound like a butler, but Kyle Farnsworth is a reliever for the Yankees. Not surprisingly, the hard-throwing right-hander routinely sets the table for closer Mariano Rivera. …

After months of negotiations, the Nationals signed third-round draft choice Stephen King, a middle infielder from Winter Park (Fla.) High School. Still no word on whether general manager Jim Bowden & Co. realize they were getting a promising shortstop, not a “Dreamcatcher.”